I have known my whole life that I am a highly sensitive person (HSP).
I didn’t know how to name these feelings or that there were other people out there like me. However, I did know how I felt.
The Struggle
I have always struggled to cope with experiences in life that other people seemed to breeze through (or even enjoy). Hearing a sad song or witnessing a kind act between strangers almost always moves me to tears. Further, the mistreatment of others or the planet deeply disturbs me.
It is easy for me to become overwhelmed by loud or repetitive sounds or intense light. Cluttered or disordered spaces and crowded, unpredictable places are terribly overstimulating to me. Even pleasant interactions with people I love quickly drain my energy.
Well-meaning people have often told me that I needed to “toughen up” or “grow a backbone.” I have also heard that I am too dramatic and cry too easily or worry too much.
On the Flip-side
I am naturally nurturing and empathic. I have a strong desire to do good for other people. Because I am so in tune with my own emotions, I am deeply cognizant of the feelings of others. Therefore, though I do make mistakes, I work hard not to cause intentional harm to anyone. Further, I have been able to build a 20-year career centered around my nurturing nature and have loved my contribution to others.
In addition, I truly see the beauty in the little things. My neurological system responds more intensely to external (and internal) stimuli. When I am out with my family, I am often able to point out a tiny bird on a cluster of branches, in a tall tree that nobody else has seen. I am also moved deeply by the rhythms and interconnectedness of the natural world. Nature is my happy place, and I love observing it in real time.
Self-Acceptance
I have always known that being an HSP makes me special. My trait has given me gifts that I know are unique to me and my personality type. Of course, it has not been easy to feel so different from those around me. I have tried, to the point of total breakdown, to shoehorn my way into what I thought was a normal life. I was there for the parties and social circles, and concerts, and noisy restaurants, and alcohol, and hectic schedules. Finally, at forty years old, I’ve realized that it is okay that none of this is for me.
I am not broken or weird or boring; just highly sensitive.
In a loud, fast-paced, often aggressive world, I get up everyday to walk softly, breathe deeply, and do it all over again.
The Blog
My goal now is to reach out to other HSPs out there, and say, hey, I see you. Of course, I am also wondering if you see yourself in any of my experiences? I hope you will feel encouraged to share your unique experiences as a HSP as well.
I would love to host a platform and a community where we can all learn from and support each other. Please remember to be kind. You never know what somebody else is going through.
